Published on June 8th, 2013 | by Nathaniel0
The Strength of a Woman: Whitley on Finding Beauty Beyond Herself
“A woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her.” ~Max Lucado
When I was growing up I didn’t feel I was beautiful. I would look at myself in the mirror and get angry because I didn’t think I fit the image that people wanted me to look like. I was not the pretty Jamaican and white little girl that people expected to see. Women are supposed to be pretty, and I was so different from what the world wanted. Gender roles will have people believe that they have uncovered their identity. Women begin playing with dolls and changing diapers by 5, while men are taught to fight and roll Tonka Trucks all over the house. My question is: does merely knowing your gender role automatically give you the strength of that gender? Just because you are a woman doesn’t mean that you understand all that it takes to be one.
I have always dreamed of having a daughter; mainly to teach her the things that I never learned growing up. Show her the do’s and dont’s of womanhood. In case you’re wondering, it is not easy being a woman. There are so many things that come with this specific gender role. The primary issue that I have found common among women is how they learned to deal with their emotions. I have seen grown women in relationships (both romantic and platonic) that are dysfunctional and unhealthy. The problem is never the emotion that the woman has, but how she chooses to handle that particular emotion. The strongest women that I know are those who do not find themselves moved while in compromising situations. It is easy to fall prey to insecurity, fear, doubt, or lack of value; but when you are able to stand strong in your foundation and stay committed to what you were called to do, that is where fruit can grow in your life.
This strength is not grown on trees, and it is not always learned but fought for. The majority of women have to pray for emotional strength and stability. It is through God where they will find the ability to stand strong during times of adversity. I have not mastered my ability to control my emotions. I admit that I am still a work in progress. However, I have mastered the ability to pray to God to help me through times of difficulty. “Strength and honor are her clothing; She shall rejoice in time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom. And on her tongue is the law of kindness.” (Proverbs 31: 25-26)
True strength is found in God. Women are such complex creatures. We deal with hormones, periods, childbirth, and all things nurturing. Women are expected to give out love and honor upon their families. In order for a woman to give these things out successfully she must know where these qualities come from. God must be her power source. She has to depend on Him during all circumstances. No situation is too small for God to lead. For example: God can handle a woman’s feeling of insecurity, frustration, jealousy, or fear. He is the best listener. He is greater than any boyfriend, best friend, or counselor. “Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.” Fear in the Old Testament is a form of reverence. God looks at someone who fears Him as someone who places his or her honor upon him. I fear God because I know what he has brought me out of. I used to make low class decisions because of my low mindset. I did not have a clear understanding of my value. When I began to commit my life fully over to God, I gained a power and a strength that I never had before. I am not just any woman but I am a woman of God. Any man or woman that finds themselves in a relationship with me knows who runs my life. I am accountable to someone other than myself. Find your strength in Him. He will set you free.