Published on November 16th, 2013 | by Mannie Ramos0
Have you ever read self-help and motivational books in order to understand your happiness or purpose? I’ll admit- I know I’m one of them and I always take something different out of each one. There is also something that I think is an underlying pillar in each book and that’s understanding self-control. Self- control is so important in basic everyday life, but I think we overlook it as a society. I have come to the realization that self-control goes hand-in-hand with happiness and success. And there are three areas where self-control is especially important: self-sabotage, greed, and envy.
Understanding Self-Sabotage: This is important on so many levels. I know we have bad days and that’s just life but when you start to talk down on yourself, you jumpstart a vicious cycle. I will be the first one to tell you- no one is perfect no matter how successful they are. Everyone makes mistakes and instead of belittling ourselves, we need to have the strength to pick ourselves up. Here’s an example- how many of us watch pornography? I admit I do but I told myself I am going to stop. I wasn’t thinking “How can I sabotage my love life with porn?”, but it seeps in our minds and spills out into our lives. I don’t know if it’s the vibes we give out or what. I am going to tell you something that you might not want to hear; porn is NOT natural. You should not have fantasies about being the pizza boy or the guy next door. I am not saying I won’t slip and watch it, but I choose to practice self-control and pick up a book or go for walk to curb those urges.
Understanding Greed: If you are like me and never had money, it’s natural to think about buying a Ferrari with your first million dollars. I know what it feels like to want those things but I choose to have the self-control because I want to start up a non-profit organization that could change the lives of many, instead of just myself. Something else that comes to mind with is over eating. I know I am big loser in this category. I am the type a person that can eat a whole pint of ice cream and then feel guilty about it. I know that if practice self-control and only eat a few bites that I could satisfy my craving and feel good about myself. Greed is ugly and if you let it set in you, you will think someone owes you something, but I will be the first one to tell you, “Life don’t owe you jack.”
Understanding Envy: Have you ever said, “If I had that life, I would be smiling too?” The secret is you could have that life if you were living yours and not envying theirs. If you always have daydreams about being like this person and that person you will never write your chapter in history. My close friends know I love Jay Z but I don’t envy him. I respect him but at the end of the day, I want to go above and beyond his accomplishments if it’s in God’s plans. If it’s not, then so be it; I will continue to live as Mannie Ramos Jr. Envy can also set in when you see someone on those health and fitness magazines. These people look like they were carved out of stone. In all honesty, that body is a testament to their hard work and sacrifice. I am sure they get the craving for that juicy burger or steak but they instead reach for that Kale or Salmon. If we all practiced self-control in this area, we could reach maximum physical conditioning.
If you simply have self-control when no is around you, you will be sure to have it when the whole world is watching. If you can’t tell stories about it or be proud of it, it’s probably not good for your life. Whatever you do in the dark will come to the light.